To be yourself is all that you can do.

Adolescence is the real beginning of an average human’s life. It is the age where you begin to explore your feelings, your dreams, yourself and your own mind. It is the age that blossoms your instincts of fitting into the world around you. I’m not saying the years before it were irrelevant. Your upbringing makes you who you are but adolescence is all about what you make of your childhood and your ideas. You explore who you are in the big bad game called the universe. 9 times out of 10, you are the mere insignificant pawn trying not to be the odd one out. Don’t worry; you’re on the same boat as about 90% of the teenage population.

You start off fresh and pure and innocent. Thinking you’re going to make a difference to others and every day will contain a new experience. So ignorant and hopeful. Then a few years go on and you find yourself in the same place you started, a ditch full of little achievements. You begin to question what you've done and if you’re ever going to reach your goals, forgetting that you’re only 16 and the world is at your feet. So, you give up. You stop caring about the little things because you think they don’t matter. You try and experience ‘new’ things and you try incredibly hard to do whatever you can to get out of the pessimistic state of mind you’re in, in order to get the future that you hope one day will come true. And SNAP. You fall into the mouse trap that the universe, or perhaps even society, sets out for you. 

This is life’s way of pushing you into a state of conformity in your adolescent time. It is this time that blossoms your instincts of fitting into the world around you. I am also assuming that this state of conformity continues even past your adolescent years but forgive me if I’m wrong, I am myself stuck in the middle of this cycle. But why? Why do we as humans feel like we have to fit in? Like we’re a puzzle piece, an inanimate object whose purpose is to complete the picture it was made to create but the reality is that it usually just gets lost and sometimes never found. We do it because adolescence isn't what we wanted it to be, and we think conforming to what everyone else is doing is what is going to bring us happiness.  We do it because we want to feel safe and as if we are completing our sole purpose on this universe and actually doing something without lives. Fitting in is the easy route to our goals, to our future. Doing the ordinary thing and sticking with the people doing the same as you. Is it true? Does it make us happy? Does it feel like we’re making a difference to other people’s lives, and our own life? I personally just feel like I’m identical to everyone else but mentally I feel like I should be miles away from the people around me.

A year ago, I honestly found myself change into someone that now I would immensely dislike. I wanted to have friends that were ‘cool,’ that went to amazing parties and wore ‘cool’ clothes. I wanted to be one of those so called ‘cool’ people that had a 'united' group of friends who stuck up for each other. In order to get those friends, I didn't stop for anything. I left my old group of friends who I had known for 8 years. I began to start intoxicating myself because everyone was doing it at these so called cool parties, going against certain beliefs and values I had once strongly had faith in. I had begun to get a little out of control but I was completely oblivious to it, because I thought I was happy. Then something brought me back to earth. It felt like it was an unearthly, almost mystical message being sent to get my head out of the clouds. Something big happened with the ‘cool’ group and I began to see their true colours which seemed to have been hidden to me because of my imaginary state of happiness. I realised I wasn't happy and these people weren't my real friends. They weren't benefiting me in anyway nor helping me get my well-deserved better future.

Can a person be happy forever, or is it just a state of mind? That would change everything. If conforming made me think I was happy for a little while, does it matter if I conformed to be happy? No, of course not; if you feel happy within yourself then do it. But the main point I wanted to express was that the main reason we conform, is because of our lack of confidence. A confident person is someone who can do their own thing and not care what others think of us. We base what we do on the judgements others make of us and this is wrong. If no-one judged each other, you could be this abstract and interesting person that you really do want to be and perhaps even be in a state of happiness for longer and on your own accord. However, back in reality, everyone judges people and it has become a part of human nature. The only way of breaking out of conformity is by having the confidence to be who you want to be, wear what you want to wear, do what YOU want to do. Easier said than done, i hear a lot of you think but believe me, over time you will begin to realise and confidence will come naturally. Basically, I'm trying to tell you to be yourself, because uniqueness is beautiful.

I leave you with audioslave because this song is brilliant and it reflects my message quite well. 

Barbarella

xoxo